Unearthed! My Film Debut In 1989's "Worst Of Enemies"

"Speed."
"Take 3. Scene 22. Sound 4."
"Slate it." Crack!
"Action!"
It's true. They really do say "Action!" and snap a slate before each scene. Everything is just the way it's supposed to be in the movies.
Except for me.
I'm a reporter, masquerading as an actor.

I used to do some crazy things in the name of journalism.

I was a newspaper editor and reporter for the "Syracuse Herald-Journal" in Syracuse, New York, from 1986 to 1995. I'm not sure how it started, but around 1989 I began writing a series of Plimpton-esque articles in which I inserted myself into some ridiculous situations for which I was ill-suited and then lived to tell the tale.

I was a stand-up comedian at a professional comedy club and a roving actor in a Renaissance faire. I rode in a hot-air balloon and bungee-jumped off a giant crane over a parking lot (although someone else in the newsroom beat me to the punch and filed their first-person account first).

I also auditioned for, and won, a small part in "Worst of Enemies" (original title "Constant Reminders"), a $240,000 film that was being filmed in Syracuse in 1989, co-written and directed by, and also starring, 26-year-old Garrett Abdo, a Syracuse native. It's about two best friends and the woman who comes between them.

Now it's time for makeup. Makeup. I'm having makeup put on my face. Eyeliner. ("Ouch!') And lipstick. (Eeewww!) I've never left a lipstick mark on a Styrofoam cup before.



I played a waiter named "Bob," who's good friends with Abdo's main character, "Mitch." I had nine lines over two scenes -- a bit more than I bargained for when I came up with the idea of being an "extra."

I'd only seen the movie once, at its Syracuse premiere on the giant screen at the opulent Landmark Theatre. From there, I think it went straight to VHS and ended up in video rental shops across America, courtesy of infamous distributor Raedon Home Video.

I've been trying to find a copy ever since, but only recently had any luck -- courtesy of Amazon -- after hooking up with Abdo on Facebook. He's now managing a comedy club in Atlanta and says he recently finished his second feature film. He's doing well after all these years.

"The most amazing thing to me is that this idea I had in my head is coming to life," Abdo told me at the time.


Part of my original story in the Syracuse Herald-Journal on May 4, 1989.

The copy of the film I received in the mail left a bit to be desired. The music's all woozy and the picture quality is pretty bad, but it has been 20 years, after all.

I had one of my scenes from "Worst of Enemies" transferred from VHS and uploaded to YouTube. It's posted above. See what you think. (Abdo is the guy in the moustache. I'm the guy dressed like a waiter.)

I had a fantastic time those many years ago and I am so glad I finally found a copy of the movie for my library.

All the best to Gary for allowing me to enter his world for a few days so many years ago.

And now, you'll have to excuse me. I've got to finish creating my page on IMDB.

An Unassuming Vintage With Hints Of Tobacco, Old Baseball Glove, and Dry Toast

We had a little party at our place after the kids went trick-or-treating in Nebušice on October 31.

It turned into an impromptu wine tasting.

I recently discovered a fantastic wine shop in the village of Horoměřice, just up the road from our home here in the metropolis of Černý Vůl, west of Prague. The shop is called The Wine Depot, and it's right on the main intersection in Horoměřice.

Frankly, it's an unlikely place for a wine shop, but who's complaining? We don't have much to choose from out here, restaurantwise or shopwise. To have a decent wine shop within a five-minute drive is a revelation.

Sadly, I only recently decided to go in and check it out. I thought it was some sort of wholesaler or something, but I was wrong. They even have quite a selection of wines to taste, and they'll give you a modest discount if you sign up for a Wine Depot membership card.

You can check out The Wine Depot's website here.

Anyway, I've started to stop by the shop and take home what I hope will be an interesting selection of wines -- one bottle each (all reds) from a variety of countries and terroirs. It's fun, and I've found some excellent bargains this way.

So, the other night, on Halloween, the adults had a few treats, as well.

We opened and drained:

-- a 2007 Luis Felipe Edwards Cabernet Sauvignon Reserva (Chile)
-- a 2007 Fine Beltran Duo Cabernet Sauvignon (Argentina)
-- a 2008 Farnese Sangiovese (Italy)
-- a 2007 Tcherga blend (Bulgaria)
-- a 2004 Palacio de la Vega Cabernet Sauvignon-Tempranillo Navarra Crianza (Spain)
-- a Concho y Toro Frontera Cabernet Sauvignon (Chile)



My good friends Momchil and Tanya brought the Bulgarian, direct from Sofia, while my good friends Stewart and Kathleen contributed the Frontera.

The other four wines, which I bought myself at The Wine Depot, were all under $10 a bottle.

We had a great time tasting and comparing.

From what I remember (things got a little hazy toward the end there), I think the overall conclusion was that we liked the Luis Felipe Edwards the best. That confirmed my own conclusion. I had recently pronounced it my new favorite wine after pairing it superbly with a homemade cheddar cheeseburger with homegrown tomatoes a few weeks ago (right). I was blown away by this beefy varietal, considering its price ($10).

We also really liked the Farnese Sangiovese, which is, perhaps, my newest most favorite wine, considering its price (around $7 a bottle). It's not quite the man that the Luis Felipe Edwards is, but it's smooth and medium-bodied and went really well with the takeout pizzas we were eating.

I hope we can do this sort of tasting again.

Next time, I'll make it a blind tasting, and throw in some drinkable $5 bottles I've found around Prague and see what comes out on top.

Maximo Park

Daisy and I went to Amsterdam last weekend to see one of our favorite bands: the UK's Maximo Park.

They also played in one of our favorite venues, the Paradiso, an old church converted into a concert hall.

We saw Lucinda Williams play there twice in 2007.

Great stuff, although we both thought that Maximo Park wasn't quite as good as they were at a Prague show at a much smaller venue earlier this year.

J'aime This Picture

Not sure what to make of this.

I was waiting in the office of a Czech foot doctor when I spotted this framed poster hanging on the wall.

And Never Come Back!!

Daisy and I spotted this funny little sandwich and drinks shop in the airport in Eindhoven, Netherlands.

Take It And Leave.

Editors Coming To Prague

These guys are coming to Prague in late November. I'm a big fan. Looking forward to it, especially at such an intimate venue as the Lucerna Music Bar.

The Černý Vůl Cat House

Luna asleep on a comfy chair.

No sooner had we miraculously found our missing cat Zhenya after she'd gone missing for 25 days (read more about that adventure here and here) than a snow-white kitten -- about 8 weeks old -- suddenly appeared, literally, on our doorstep.

It's almost like we have a VACANCY sign blinking on the front of our house, fashioned from special neon that's visible only to cats.

You may remember our memorable meetings with Flake and with Flukey.

There was also the tragedy of Oskar Junior.

And Oskar, our wild outdoor cat (Oscar Wild), for those who are following along, is doing just fine, after his scary bout with pneumonia earlier this year (when he lived in our bathroom for a month).

He's back outside now, comes every morning and every night for his packet of wet Whiskas and dry food, and even comes into our house a few steps and looks around before deciding that he likes it better outside. (We're hoping he decides to come inside permanently once winter sets in, but it's unlikely.)

But back to the kitten.

We suddenly found ourselves caring for the cutest white kitten you ever did see. And one with the most perfect personality -- affectionate, didn't scratch, and loved to play. And she wasn't deaf, unlike a lot of pure white kittens.

Don't know where she came from, but she decided she liked us, and got along with Oskar, so we found ourselves feeding her, too.

We took her to the vet and had her checked out. Aside from some sort of infection on the outside of her ears, she checked out fine, so we brought her inside and introduced her to Zhenya and our other cat, Chicho. Zhenya and Chicho tolerated the kitten, whom Emma named Luna.

We just couldn't see having four cats, however, and put the word out that we had a beautiful kitten for the taking.


Luna posing under a pine tree in our front yard.

She lived with us for a week or so before we found a very good home for her, much to our relief.

She did have a funny way of climbing into bed in the middle of the night and rubbing her face on my mouth and beard, over and over. Cute, at first. And then not so much.

Can someone please turn the VACANCY sign off now?


Oskar's getting so used to us that he now turns over almost automatically when he sees us so we can scratch his tummy.


Our regular cats Chicho and Zhenya sleep-surfing on the popular comfy chair.


Zhenya.


Chicho.

The Most Unwelcoming Grocery Store In Prague?

It takes a lot to win this award. There are some truly forbidding grocery stores in the city, especially out in the boondocks, where I live.

But this one, in the village of Přední Kopanina, takes the cake.

There's not even a sign to indicate that it is a grocery store. It's got bars on the windows.

And it's the type of grocery store, left over from communist times, where everything is behind a counter and you have to ask the attendant to let you see or touch a product.

But I'm sure they do it all with a smile.

Harvest Of Fame

I wrote about Daisy's tomato plants the other day.

She's on a reporting trip at the moment (in Mongolia!), so I had the distinct pleasure of harvesting 13 perfect tomatoes.

They are quite small, almost like cherry tomatoes, but very delicious.

Reaping What She Sowed

One of Daisy's goals this year was to plant some flowers and vegetables from seed and, hopefully, see them mature.

A few weeks ago, she and Emma harvested the first ripe fruit from the 10 or so tomato plants she's been carefully nurturing.

While the tomato itself wasn't huge, the occasion itself was pretty significant.

It was the first time Daisy had ever planted something and then eaten what she'd grown.

As you can see, both Daisy and Emma were very excited.

More Product Names You Won't Find In The West

My good friend Rob sent this one in.

He saw this ad for ice cream in the Czech town of Neveklov. Pinko is the name of a Czech ice cream company. As far as I know, the company is not, and never has been, run by communists.

Speaking of ice cream, and ads you're not likely to see in the West, what about this Russian ice cream ad that aims to capitalize (sadly, in a racist manner) on the popularity of U.S. President Barack Obama?

It's called Duet, and advertises itself as "Black in White!"



The ad, as you can see, features a caricature intended to suggest Obama depicted in front of, oddly enough, not the White House, but the Capitol building.

The creator of the ad insisted it's a joke and is not racist.

Driving With The Grim Reaper

Is it just me, or is it unusual to have Death, the old Grim Reaper, depicted not once, but twice, on an official highway sign?

Like, where did they get this design? Is there some officially approved representation of Death in a manual somewhere in the bowels of the Transportation Ministry or something?

We passed this on a highway near the Czech city of Cesky Krumlov, near the Austrian border.

Basically, it says: Attention! Section For Fatal Accidents

We were joking that wouldn't it have been funny -- or ironic, at least -- if I'd been struck and killed after pulling over to the side of the road to take this photo?

Yes, so funny. Hilarious even.

OK, not so much.

Sunflower Surprise

We were surprised to find this beautiful sunflower growing beneath the bird feeder behind our house.

Obviously, some of the sunflowers from the bird feeder fell to the ground, and then nature took its course.

Obvious, yes, but also kind of wondrous.

Biker Chick

I'm just her driver.

Emma has been wanting a ride on my motorcycle, and who am I to say no?

We have a little road in front of our house that's basically more of a driveway than a road. I thought it wouldn't hurt to take her up and down the road a few times. There are no cars really, and I couldn't get out of first gear.

I made her wear her bicycle helmet, though, just in case.

I think she looks really cool.

Best Banana Bread In The World

I took a loaf of this banana bread into work today and snapped this photo with my iPhone. Not the greatest picture, but you get the idea.

I like to bake.

I like to cook real food every once in awhile (see my never-fail chili recipe here), but I really do enjoy baking.

Not that my repertoire is extensive.

I can make a mean apple pie from scratch, including the crust, and I also like to make cakes and breads.

The following recipe for banana bread has treated me right. It's rich and dense and moist. It's deceptively easy to make. And it's versatile. You can use three bananas or four, whatever you've got. Throw in some crushed walnuts or pecans. Or not.

Everyone raves about this bread. It always makes me look good, but I don't really do anything.

I got the recipe from my ex-wife, Deana. I'm not sure where she got it. It'd be nice to know, just to give credit where credit is due.

Anyway, here's the recipe, in English measurements.

I hope you like it.

BEST BANANA BREAD IN THE WORLD

1/2 cup oil
1 cup sugar
2 eggs
3 or 4 overripe bananas
2 cups flour
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
3 tbl milk
1/2 tsp vanilla

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Beat oil and sugar together. Add eggs and mashed bananas. Mix well.

Mix dry ingredients together and add to banana mixture. Stir in milk and vanilla. Add nuts if you've got any.

Pour into greased and floured loaf pan. Bake 45-55 minutes or until it is brown on top and springs back to the touch. (I usually insert a knife into the middle of the loaf. It's done when the knife comes back out clean.)

Make some coffee. Eat the bread.

Good GAZ

I've been admiring this wonderfully maintained old Soviet GAZ sedan for weeks now and decided to share.

I've seen it on Srbska in Prague 6.

It's now being used as a AAA taxi, one of the few honest taxi companies in Prague.

More Packaging You'll Probably Not Find In The West

This photo was taken at the Prague Airport. It's some sort of coffee, featuring characters that would appear to date from brand packaging from the United States in the 1920s or something.

Zhenya!

Zhenya, just a few minutes after we brought her back home.

We found her.

Yes, we’ve got Zhenya back, believe it or not -– 25 days after she first went missing. She escaped unnoticed at night on July 23 when the good folks who were watching her for us (while we were in Croatia) came home one night and she slipped out the door before they could turn on the light. Then someone in their apartment building stupidly let her outside. And then she disappeared.

She’s very thin, and tired, and has a few nicks and one big tick (since removed), but we just came back from the vet, and she’s been given a clean bill of health, and we couldn’t be more excited.

We’d been hanging up hundreds of posters in the Prague 6 neighborhood from whence she escaped on July 23. We’d also put hundreds of the posters directly into mailboxes in the neighborhood, since the rain had a nasty way of erasing the printing on the posters we hung. We’d also been calling the animal shelters, and had put notices on expats.cz and prague.tv.

We’d been getting a call a day or so from folks who’d thought they seen her, but none of the leads ever panned out.

Until August 16.

That’s when a nice couple who live in the same building from which Zhenya escaped -- on Radimova in Prague 6 -- came knocking at the door, saying they thought they’d seen Zhenya just a few minutes before a few blocks away, near another apartment building.

In fact, the guy’s wife was waiting back at the spot at that very moment.

An urgent search revealed no Zhenya, however.

We came back the next evening, and we spotted her –- or a cat that certainly looked a lot like her -- hiding in some thick bushes near the foundation of the same apartment building, near Anastazova.

Our hearts leapt.

But she wouldn’t come out easily.

We lost sight of her quite a few times, almost hopelessly so.

We put out food for her, called to her, rattled the food bin, shined a flashlight into the dark undergrowth and into basement windows, and crawled under brambles.

She wouldn’t show herself.

Another couple walked by. Hearing us calling for Zhenya, they said, “Oh, that’s not your cat. That’s Matisek. He lives around here.”

Daisy’s heart sank. I, thankfully, wasn’t around to hear that little anecdote.

We kept searching, until Daisy thought she heard Zhenya’s meow. I crawled through the bushes and saw her crouching on a small ledge in the darkness.

I crawled closer, expecting her to scamper away, but she sat up and kind of turned toward me, as if she knew her nightmare was over, and I grabbed her by the scruff and pulled her up and out.

I felt like crying. I couldn't believe I had her.


Zhenya, just a few minutes ago.

Just to make sure, we looked for the little black spot on her lip that we knew would mean it couldn’t be any other cat than Zhenya.

The black spot was right where we hoped it would be.

We’d found her.

I felt the adrenaline, or whatever it was, making my hands and feet tingle. I can’t remember when I’ve been so happy, or so relieved.

We'd offered a reward of 5,000 Czech crowns, or about $275, for information leading to Zhenya's return. We were happy to give the money to the couple who pointed us in the right direction. We wouldn't have found her without their help.

She's been meowing like crazy since she's been home, no doubt telling us stories of her incredible adventures over the past three weeks.

Thanks so much to everyone who told us stories or left messages on this blog, or on Facebook or Twitter or expats.cz, about their own happy-ending experiences with lost cats.

They really kept our spirits up, and our hopes alive.

Help Us Find Zhenya. There's A 5,000 Kc Reward

We're devastated.

We've just returned from two weeks on vacation to discover that our beloved cat, Zhenya, escaped from the apartment at Radimova 17 in Prague 6, where she was being kept.

She's been gone for two weeks now, with one possible sighting.

She's a beautiful orange cat, very skittish, with gorgeously soft fur.

If you live in the general area of the Břevnov Monastery and the Střešovice neighborhoods of Prague 6, please be on the lookout.

If you find her or think you've seen her, please call me at 728-070-139, or Emma's father and stepmother at 777-855-768 or 608-248-312.

We're prepared to pay a reward of 5,000 Kc.

In Bad Humors

The wires in question.

On Friday, July 10, I spent the day in Prague's Motol hospital to have the stabilizing wires removed from the reconstructed AC joint in my left shoulder. You'll recall that I had reconstructive surgery on my shoulder at the end of May.

I thought it was going to be pretty routine, but my most recent visit ended up being one of the most sickening experiences of my life.

I was given three shots of local anesthesia in my shoulder while in my hospital room.

Then, I was wheeled into an operating theater in Motol just like my first surgery.

Then the surgeon basically reopened my old entrance wound to gain access to the wires.

At first, it didn't feel so bad. Pretty routine. I couldn't really feel anything. And my shoulder was blocked from my view, thankfully, by a large surgical blanket.

But then the pulling and tugging began.

It felt like the surgeon was trying to pull my entire skeleton through a keyhole using a pair of pliers.

It was more the feeling of what was happening rather than any searing pain.

I got very dizzy and almost passed out while he wrestled the wires out of my shoulder. I was breathing pretty hard. The whole thing took about 30 minutes or so -- a very long 30 minutes.


Both times I've been at Motol hospital for shoulder surgery, a nurse has come in and wrapped both of my legs in bandages just before going under the knife. I asked my surgeon why, and he laughed and said he didn't really know. Someone else told me it is to prevent thrombosis. I looked it up and it said "compression stockings" are often used. The bandages they put on me were wrapped pretty loosely, as you can see. Weird.

I related this story to a good friend of mine in the United States, who had shoulder surgery himself a few years back, and he was incredulous that I hadn't been given some sort of drugs to distract me while the removal of the wires occurred:

"Jesus, Grant, The doctors over there practice medicine as if it were the Middle Ages. Did they bleed you to get the bad humors out? I can understand not putting you under. Anesthesiologists have to be prepared to breathe for you if something goes hinky. But you should have been so loaded up with opiates that you'd have been cracking knock-knock jokes while they pulled out the wires. There's just no excuse for this."

All I can say is, I am glad that's over! Jeesh.